It’s the Little Things

No matter what anyone tells you, there’s nothing that can prepare for the major life change of having a kid. Nothing in life stays the same. You’re suddenly following a new schedule, with new routines, and changing your family dynamic from being a family of two to a family of three.

Sometimes I feel like Jason and I are walking around in a daze. We just try to keep up with all these new demands on this new schedule, like a dizzying merry-go-round. There are times we get to sit back and enjoy, but mostly we’re just trying to keep up!

Yesterday, I was trying to do laundry (that’s also a new thing, you don’t just “do laundry” anymore, you “try to get laundry done” if you can find the time!). I managed to get the towels washed and dried, but they hadn’t made it out of the dryer by the end of the day. As I was putting Jake to bed, I asked Jason to throw them on the couch for me and I’d fold them and put them away before I went to bed.

My sweet hubby went the extra mile and did all the folding and putting away for me before I was done with Jake. Laundry is usually my chore, so I definitely appreciated the help; especially since I know Jason doesn’t like doing it.

As I was getting ready for bed that night, one little thing Jason did, made all the difference in the world to me.

I have this weird quirk/routine of hanging my washcloth on the side of our tub after I wash off my makeup at night. I think it started when we first moved into our house. We only have one towel rack, which holds our bath towels, so I didn’t know what to do with my wet washcloth. I flopped it on the side of the tub to dry and have done that every night since (I really should find a better way of hanging it up or something).

Last night as I was in the middle of washing my face, I remembered that I had put my washcloth in the laundry, so assumed I wouldn’t have one to use. I turned around and there was my washcloth. Hanging over the side of the tub, where I usually leave it. Not only had Jason noticed I always do that, but he made sure to leave my washcloth there for me when putting away the towels.

In all the craziness and chaos of life, having someone walking along side of you that knows all of your weird quirks and habits, and takes the time to do something random, just the way you like it… It’s pretty awesome. Something so small and really so insignificant made me feel such a bond with Jason. We’re a team. We know each other’s likes and dislikes and without even having to say anything, we can keep our hectic life on track together.

I’m looking forward to the next 30, 40 or 50+ years of living life side by side with Jason. Learning more and more of each other’s weird quirks and meshing our lives even more.

And I’m also looking forward to looking back on this post and saying, “Girl, you haven’t seen anything yet! The best is yet to come….”


Seems to me like there’s a lot of “Oh…” going around in the parenting world. “Oh, you’re feeding your newborn formula?” “Oh, you’re breastfeeding until your kid is 4 years old?” “Oh, you co-sleep?” “Oh, you let them watch tv?”… “Oh, you didn’t vaccinate?”

I find it exhausting to read all of the articles about what we are not doing correctly as parents. There’s some level of perfection out there that is illusive and completely unattainable because as soon as you get it all “right,” new research shows you’ve been doing it “wrong” the whole time.

I think it’s time we all start extending some grace and understanding to our fellow parents. I believe our job as parents is to research our options and make the best decision for our family. Given the exact same information, I’m convinced we could all draw different conclusions as to what the “right “ thing to do is, based on our own life experiences and personal biases.

Sure, I think I know best. After all, I’ve spent hours researching anything and everything having to do with parenting and all the popular controversial topics of our time. In reality though, I’m not perfect, we live in an imperfect world, and I’m not going to do everything “right” no matter how hard I try. And even if I do, I’ve seen great parents with messed up kids and messed up parents with great kids.

I think our job as parents is to weigh the pros and cons of different issues and opinions, pray for guidance, and make the best decisions we can for our own family.

I also know I need to apologize in advance for any judgment I pass on other parents. There are a lot of good parents out there that will raise their children quite differently than I will raise mine. And that’s okay, because I’m not their child’s parent, they are. As long as they have their child’s best interest at heart, I want to support them. In my infinite (cough, cough) knowledge, I may think I know better than them, but let’s be honest, we’re all just making educated guesses when it comes to this whole parenting thing.

So good job, mom who feeds her baby formula because breastfeeding was such a struggle that she couldn’t love and enjoy her baby otherwise. And good job, mom who breastfeeds her children until they’re 4 years old because she believes it will provide long term health benefits for them. And good job, mom who co-sleeps because it’s the only way she can get the rest she needs to continue to love and care for her child. And good job, mom who lets her kids watch tv so she can focus on herself for a few minutes and be reenergized for the hard work of being a mom. … And good job, mom who didn’t vaccinate your kid. I’m assuming you didn’t come to this decision lightly and now, more than ever, you are facing extreme opposition for doing what you have determined is best for your family.